Mirror Mirror

It's a constant struggle.  A daily dilemma. My desire to be a modest and feminine woman of God, cultivating an inner beauty of sound character VS. a culture that tells me my highest aspiration as a woman should be to look sexy at all times.  It's obvious on paper, isn't it?  But we are not a society of words, thoughts, and ideas; we are a society of pictures, commercials, and soundbites.  In 30 seconds, a girl can't get across the depths of her thoughts or the depth of her soul...but she can flash a little leg.  And after all, what's going to get the most attention?  

So, if getting the most attention is the main focus of an entire culture that politics via punchlines and educates via headlines, how do we, pursuing biblical womanhood, shun the status-quo and fix our eyes on higher and nobler ideas?

The answer:  Truth.  We are surrounded by lies every way we turn.  We can't avoid them!  They come in through our computers, our tvs, the radio, magazines, books, conversations, social media, memories from our past, glances from people we encounter.  We can't get away from all- the- lies!  We're being fed a steady stream of the world's opinion on how we should look and how we should behave and the only way to combat it is to take time for truth every day.  If we are to be women of God, then we must be women of the Word.  Only by feeding on truth, the daily Bread that has been provided for us, do we stand any chance against the enemy we are facing every second of every day.  Remember ladies, we have to stop trying so hard to fit in when we're so beautifully designed to stand out.  Light doesn't blend into the darkness!  It makes a statement in a sea of contradicting thoughts, even if its incomprehensible to those around us.  If we are truly living our lives as a reflection of Christ, it shouldn't matter what reflection we see in the mirror.

It's not easy.  But be encouraged that you are not alone.  Keep cultivating a submissive heart and godly character because that's what's truly beautiful to God.

The Broken List

There are always aspects of me that I don't like, things I'm always striving to improve upon.  If I had a task list of life-objectives, areas of my own self that I could find fault with, it would extend beyond any vision of the horizon before me.  I am never satisfied.

I feel like, if I could take my life and hold it at arms length, an intimate distance but a distance still, I would be uncomfortable with what I was looking at.  I would be consumed with all the divots of failure, chasms of bad decisions, canyons of perpetual disobedience that left me wandering in valleys of confusion and hopelessness.  I would see something broken.

In Sunday School, my students are reading through the book of John.  Our method is to read straight through a book or a chapter, dissect it as we go along, and derive truth out of what is in front of us.  We are determined to know John better than any other class in our church and with knowing John comes knowing Jesus.  I have stressed that as Christians, we should know as much about Jesus as we can learn.  After all, if we don't know Jesus, then we're missing Christianity entirely.  Jesus, if nothing else, is a brilliant historical figure!  He was not quiet or shy, defensive or obnoxious, insecure or proud.  He made fantastic statements like, "Destroy this temple and I will raise it in three days."  He called out hypocrites, called people "vipers" in public settings when He saw them propagating false teachings.  He turned over tables and took a whip to people dishonoring the temple.  He even disowned his own family members when they insinuated He was unstable.  He talked to people who others passed by and ignored, rejected, despised.  Throughout the biographies of Jesus (we call them the Gospels), we see a person who loves the down-trodden, the underdog, the broken.

And that's the best part, really.  The reality is that Jesus is so much more than just an historical figure, stuck in the passages of time gone by, teaching us from a comfortable distance.  He's actually even closer than the intimate distance of an arms-length away.  And He still has that soft-spot for the broken.  In fact, He said only the broken need a healer.

So when I'm making my list, that daunting list of all those things I need to improve on, as a follower of Jesus Christ, I have the option, the luxury of turning all of those things over to Him.  Then, and only then, will I experience true satisfaction, not in myself, but in Him.

Boots and Beliefs

Source

I love boots.  In this kind of weather, they're perfect with almost any outfit.  Going to the office, church, a party, the grocery store...yep there's no wrong place to wear a great pair of boots.

Recently, I had a friend ask me how I did the whole "skirts thing" in the winter.  Of course, it was a guy who asked.  Girls are well-acquainted with all the fun and fashionable tights, boot socks, leggings, long moleskin skirts, long johns, flannel skirts, corduroy skirts, denim skirts, and of course tall boots that keep a girl cozy warm and fashion forward.  

My blogging hero Kristina, of KristinaJ, wrote a fantastic post about "standing on a platform of modesty while still trying to look attractive and approachable."  (You can read it here.)    It's something I've struggled with, I'll be honest.  In the past, my tendency has been to throw on whatever's easiest and not worry about how other people perceived me.  But the truth is, I was lying to myself.  I did worry about how other people perceived me.  I hated feeling unkempt and uncaring.  And it painted a picture of my beliefs as disheveled at best, and particularly unremarkable.  Part of my pursuit of biblical womanhood was determining that if I was going to stand out because of the way I dressed, it shouldn't be because I looked like I got dressed in the dark.  If people were going to ask me about my wardrobe decisions and the whole "skirts thing", I wanted to be able to answer the questions with confidence, not embarrassment.

Of course i haven't mastered being a fashionista, or even being able to make outfits out of neutral colors, but I am more intentional than I've ever been.  And with a great pair of boots, I really can't go wrong.

Don't Bite Your Friends

I really like my life.  That’s not something I could always say.  In fact, exactly one year ago, I would have said the exact opposite.  But, what a difference a year has made!  Though I’m not always at ease in my mind or with the world around me, I have come to a place where I feel solid about how I believe and what I choose to put my faith in.  And  yet…there are still so many times when I feel like a child, just learning the things I should have already mastered.

There’s a show my little niece watches that has a song on it called:  Don’t Bite Your Friends.  And from what I’ve heard of it, those are most of the lyrics.  “Don’t bite your friends!  Don’t bite your friends!”  That’s good advice for a toddler.  And, as it turns out, good advice for adults too.  But maybe it should go more like, “Don’t backbite your friends!”  Yeah….

It’s in these times, I am so thankful for God’s grace.  Where would I be without it?  When it came time to confess, I felt like a scared child.  Appropriately.  After all, I had acted like a child.  But God gave me the opportunity to make it right again, with Him, and with the other person.  And all I received in return for my confession…was love.  Love, love, and more love.  Love from a friend who laughed and forgave, love from my Heavenly Father who was kind enough to bring conviction and then kind enough to grant me relief when I had done what needed done.

And all I can think is… “God, will You make me as gracious as You are?”  I pray that I’m the friend who laughs, loves, and forgives in the face of disloyalty.  “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.”  What a wonderful feeling, to be forgiven!  It’s the very thing that allows me to truly love this life God has given me.  And though I will still, like a child, need to learn and relearn many things on this Christian walk, I know that I am being led by a gracious, kind, and forgiving God.  What’s not to love?

Discipline

I don't love working out.  In fact, I like to find excuses to avoid it most days.  It disrupts my schedule and messes up my hair and make-up.  And when its over, I usually need a shower so I don't smell like nasty sweat.  And yet, I know it's a valuable discipline.  Once I've done it, I feel better.  I like knowing that I'm getting stronger.  I like seeing the results in the way my clothes look.  I like knowing that I've made a healthy choice.

SiL (Sister-in-Law) and I have been doing a workout program for about a month now.  Though I'd like to see faster results (you know, like the ones in the infomercials), I have to rejoice in the little victories.  I can kick higher.  I can do more push-ups.  I haven't dropped 10 sizes in 60 days, but I've made some progress.  It's not easy, but I'm not doing it for the easy.

Last weekend I was challenged to start a "spiritual work-out" for 90 days.  I knew this challenge was for me b/c lately, I'll admit it, my spiritual muscles are weak.  I've neglected Bible reading, put off prayer, and filled my mind and heart with worthless junk.  And my soul has definitely gotten flabby.

So, one week into this challenge, and wouldn't ya know, I'm not seeing the results as fast as I want.  Not because things aren't happening, they're just not happening right this second.  I want to be a prayer warrior, or a Bible-buff.  I want to be spiritually fit now.  But, just like my physical workout, it's not an overnight success.  Getting up early is a discipline I've neglected for too long.  And quieting my heart before God doesn't come as naturally as you'd think.  In order to be spiritually healthy, I have to invest the time it takes to make real changes.  It's not easy...but I'm not doing it for the easy.

Anyone else out there trying to live a more disciplined life?  What have been your most difficult days?  What have been your victories along the way?

Marthas Anonymous

Luke 10:2 Therefore said he unto them, The harvest truly is great, but the labourers are few: pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he would send forth labourers into his harvest.

I’ll admit it, I’m a Martha.  It’s really nothing to be proud of, and yet, I tend to wear it like a badge of honor.  If Jesus were to come to my house for dinner, I would absolutely be the one bustling around trying to get the food on the table, frustrated because Mary wouldn’t help, and annoyed with Jesus for not appreciating my efforts. 

I think I might be a stress junkie…or worse, an approval junkie.  I tend to get the most approval when I default to my Martha ways, picking up the slack here, lending a hand there, making promises that I have to back out on later because I’ve over-extended myself, and constantly fighting with the guilt that comes from sitting down.  In an effort to appease that inner nagging, this Single Girl can book a whole week with others-oriented activities and wake up on Sunday with a do-gooder hangover and a heart full of resentment.  See…being a Martha is nothing to boast about. 

And then I got to thinking about the verse about the “Lord of the harvest.”  And I’m just certain that God put it on my heart because I started to look at it in a completely different way.  You see, I always focused on the “harvest truly is great, but the labourers are few” part.  After all, that’s the kind of verse you use on Bible College students when you want them to feel a sense of urgency about going into the ministry.  And, indeed, there is an urgency.  So, a Martha like me just runs out into the field at full speed, trying to harvest all alone.  And when someone draws my attention to another field, what can I do but run to that field, then back to the first field, and then add a third, fourth, and fifth field?  But upon further inspection, I noticed that the verse doesn’t say:  “pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he would give you supernatural determination to work yourself sick.”  Of course not.  It says something much more practical:  “pray ye therefore the Lord of the harvest, that he would send forth labourers into his harvest.” 

Do you think I ever do that?  Nope. Why not?
 

Because I don’t like how I might look to someone if instead of saying “yes,” to whatever service they want me for, I instead say, “Let me pray that God will send the right person for that ministry.”  I mean, seriously, how’s an approval-junkie supposed to get a fix in a situation like that?

Which makes me think…maybe my crazy/busy life is less about God and more about…me.  How’s that for humbling?

So, I guess it’s time to get real with my events calendar and do some pruning…and some praying…and some sitting at the feet of Jesus.

Any advice from former-Marthas out there?